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Clinging to relevance by mendacity about U.S. historical past with former Texas Rep. Nate Schatzline

January 21, 2026
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Culture warrior Nate Schatzline be talking shit again.
Tradition warrior Nate Schatzline be speaking shit once more. Credit score: Fb / Nate Schatzline

Assclown Alert is a column of opinion, evaluation and snark. 

Former Texas Rep. Nate Schatzline has apparently determined that one of the simplest ways to remain related after his resignation from the Texas Lege is to fireside up a podcast mic, mangle 18th-century historical past and be a part of the refrain of dishonest dickheads claiming the U.S. is a Christian nation.

On his For Liberty And Justice podcast, the previous Fort Price Republican rep thundered that “America is a Christian nation,” citing the Northwest Ordinance of 1787 as proof the nation’s founders demanded fundamentalist indoctrination in public faculties. 

Schaztline even claimed children had been required to be taught Christianity earlier than morality, and morality earlier than studying, writing and arithmetic.

That’s not simply improper. It’s so improper that Schatzline is both unable to examine a junior excessive comprehension degree, or he’s only a fucking liar.

Right here’s what the Northwest Ordinance truly says: “Faith, morality, and information, being essential to good authorities and the happiness of mankind, faculties and the technique of training shall endlessly be inspired.”

That’s it. No command to show Christianity. No institution of a Bible-before-all-other-books hierarchy. No government-ordered Sunday faculty, and positively no Ten Commandments posted in each classroom. 

The ordinance is a broad assertion that training ought to promote faith basically, together with morality and information — a doc holding up the significance of civic advantage — and clearly not a blueprint for a Christian state.

Take into account this: the identical technology of thinkers that handed the Northwest Ordinance additionally ratified the First Modification, which explicitly bars authorities from establishing a faith. Thomas Jefferson famously warned towards those that would breach the “wall of separation” between church and state. 

In different phrases, assclowns like Schatzline.

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